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m8e Rank: Ozzy This message was updated on 3/16/2007 2:27:47 AM by m8e	The Yardbird posted on: 12/17/2006 4:33:00 PM On January 24th The Stage live music pub wil be changing its name to the "Yardbird Jazz Club," claiming (threatening?) that it will be, quote, "the Midlands premier jazz/funk venue." I must admit that, despite assurances from the manageress that the late bar/cheap booze/free entry/no dress code policy of The Stage will be retained, I don't like the sound of this at all. Imposed, like all pub makeovers these days, from the top down rather than being a response to any grassroots customer request, it seems to me that by focusing on those most tediously tasteful of genres, funk and "rare groove," it will merely contribute to the general blandifying Broad Street-ization of city centre nightlife. The Stage as it is now is just fine (although Friday night does seem to have become thug night recently), with jazz on Thursdays and Sundays, and good time pub rock bands tearing up the place every Saturday, and I reckon they'd be better off just adopting an if it ain't broke don't fix it policy. Mind you, if it was left up to me, I'd change the name of the place to "The Floating Signifier," install permanent strobe lighting, play non-stop cutting-edge drum & bass, and have nitrous oxide on draught. I do think I've missed my vocation sometimes.
m8e Rank: Ozzy This message was updated on 3/16/2007 2:28:22 AM by m8e	The Yardbird replied on: 1/26/2007 8:57:21 AM I see that it failed to open as advertised on the 24th due to the builders still being in there making such subtle renovations as bricking-up the windows. It's now rescheduled to open on February 2nd, but already the curse of m8e seems to be hexing it.
m8e Rank: Ozzy This message was updated on 3/16/2007 2:29:11 AM by m8e	The Yardbird replied on: 2/25/2007 2:48:56 AM OK, credit where it's due - there are a few positive things to be said about the makeover. For one thing the new sound system is absolutely superb, and a proper mixing desk has been installed to allow the live acts to present themselves to the best of their ability. And the resident hyper-enthusiastic MC does an amazing human beatbox performance (I couldn't resist asking him if he could replicate hardcore acid techno style overdriven 303 riffs), somehow managing to keep a solid simulated rhythm section going while free-styling on top of it. Check him out. On the downside, however, the DJ who plays between the live sets never once deviated from the same pedestrian BPM all night. Much too conservative. All nigbt long I couldn't help but think how much more interesting it would be if yours truly was given the opportunity to DJ there. Admittedly I'd be as likely to clear the place as rock it, but at least I can categorically guarantee there'd be no messin' with Mr Inbetween.
Rowley-Russ Rank: Toyah	Impending makeover of The Stage replied on: 3/3/2007 3:30:51 PM Wait, woah there, slow down, hold on: is the former Stage now this 'The Yardbird'? I am slow, I realise. Cantaloop are playing there soon, anyway, if it is. I like them.
m8e Rank: Ozzy This message was updated on 3/5/2007 5:44:24 AM by m8e	Commodified cool replied on: 3/4/2007 4:45:24 PM quote: Wait, woah there, slow down, hold on: is the former Stage now <a href=http://www.myspace.com/theyardbirdbirmingham target=_blank>this 'The Yardbird'</a>? It is. Someone has clearly made an effort with the place, and if safely commodified cool is what you're after, then look no further. Free entry too. I still reckon they should let me play a deterritorialized DJ set though.
Rowley-Russ Rank: Toyah This message was updated on 3/4/2007 5:45:00 PM by Rowley-Russ	Impending makeover of The Stage replied on: 3/4/2007 5:44:37 PM Well, I'll go on that night to see that band. I see enough gigs in venues I don't like that are absolute dumps. The chance to see one in a venue I probably won't like but is slightly less of a dive will be a welcome one.
m8e Rank: Ozzy This message was updated on 3/16/2007 2:30:13 AM by m8e	The Yardbird replied on: 3/11/2007 4:06:39 AM Seems I spoke too soon about the free entry - it was 4 quid in to see the band last night (thin end of the wedge, etc). Another unwelcome development is the employment of a posse of hefty bouncers on the door. Indeed, a slightly eccentric multilingual mate of mine (he can tap for a drink in 4 languages including Latin) was told by the bouncers never to come back again merely because he'd been ordering his drinks in German. Apparantly the bar staff thought he was insulting them. Dummkopfs.
Rowley-Russ Rank: Toyah	Impending makeover of The Stage replied on: 3/11/2007 8:25:55 AM quote: There are people in this city who should categorically be prevented from breeding. I quite agree. You'd lose all your charm if there was another one of you.
m8e Rank: Ozzy	Impending makeover of The Stage replied on: 3/11/2007 11:27:29 AM quote: quote: There are people in this city who should categorically be prevented from breeding. I quite agree. You'd lose all your charm if there was another one of you. I leave my family's genetic replication to my brother.
Rowley-Russ Rank: Toyah	Impending makeover of The Stage replied on: 3/13/2007 5:34:54 PM Don't lie to me. I know hallucinogenics cause you to start sporing.
m8e Rank: Ozzy This message was updated on 3/16/2007 2:31:19 AM by m8e	The Yardbird replied on: 3/15/2007 1:23:14 AM quote: Don't lie to me. I know hallucinogenics cause you to start sporing. You seem to be confusing genetics with memetics here Russ. BTW, regarding my earlier quip about having nitrous oxide on draught, I read in Metro last week that bar and club owners will now face 2 years in prison if they allow it to be sold on their premises. As if to somehow justify this pathetic piece of killjoy legislation, it was mentioned that a 23-year old company director had been found dead from asphyxiation with an empty nitrous cannister next to him, when in fact it is absolutely impossible to asphyxiate from breathing nitrous from a balloon in the manner in which it is consumed in clubs. Indeed, this legislation seems suspiciously like the work of the same small-minded, self-appointed thought police who took it upon themselve to legislate against people exploring their own minds with psilocybin mushrooms a couple of years ago. As Tim Leary once observed, psychedelics have the curious effect of engendering irrational fears in the minds of people who don't take them.
Rowley-Russ Rank: Toyah This message was updated on 3/15/2007 8:13:09 AM by Rowley-Russ	Impending makeover of The Stage replied on: 3/15/2007 7:56:43 AM quote: You seem to be confusing genetics with memetics here Russ. Heh heh heh. Well played. Also, it's no good editing things out of your posts when someone else has already quoted them.
m8e Rank: Ozzy This message was updated on 3/16/2007 10:50:49 AM by m8e	Impending makeover of The Stage replied on: 3/16/2007 3:12:02 AM quote: quote: You seem to be confusing genetics with memetics here Russ. Heh heh heh. Well played. Also, it's no good editing things out of your posts when someone else has already quoted them. Well I just wanted to be on the safe side in case there was a remote chance that the Trisha trash I'd slagged off were ever going to read it. Anyway, after meeting KotH at the Tight Meat Duo gig last night (intense!!), I dragged him along to the Yardbird on-till-two free jazz night, and he was well impressed (BTW, we had the privilege of being tapped by the legendary Miss Not-a-Tramp en route there. My all-time favourite city centre beggar). The identical twin telepathic sax duo were playing while he was there, but he really should have stayed there to witness a scarily young keyboard player take to the Fender Rhodes and give Herbie Hancock a goddamn good run for his money. I have to admit that, despite my reservations about the substitution of jazz-funk outfits for good time pub rock bands on Saturday nights, The Yardbird really is the best place to be in Brum on a Thursday night.
Rowley-Russ Rank: Toyah	Impending makeover of The Stage replied on: 3/16/2007 5:59:28 PM That one was edited in a cannier fashion.
m8e Rank: Ozzy This message was updated on 3/31/2007 3:11:44 AM by m8e	Oh me of little faith. replied on: 3/31/2007 2:44:24 AM As if attracting the absolute cream of young improvising jazz musicians for the late night Thursday jam sessions wasn't enough, the place is now being rocked on Fridays by some of the best freestyle DJ's on the planet. Last night a space on the floor was cleared to let a posse of amazingly athletic young breakdancers do their awesome thing to the accompaniment of a DJ set which somehow mixed soul, funk, house, electro, rock, rap, hip-hop, and drum & bass into a seamlessly danceable sonic flow. A specific highlight for me was watching the breakdancers spinning on their heads to Led Zep's Immigrant Song, closely followed by a sudden double-tempo blast of drum & bass, and snatches of Hendrix, Talking Heads, and Edgar Winter (ask your dad). The last time I witnessed such a joyous freestyle DJ set on a Friday night was in the old Sputnik Bar, and I later found out that one of last night's DJs had indeed played there back in the day. I think I'm almost getting over the fact that they're never going to book Cracker and the Woodpeckers to play there again.
Rowley-Russ Rank: Toyah	Oh me of little faith. replied on: 3/31/2007 1:38:37 PM This is a happy story.
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